Time, Effort and Love: Top 5 Proposal tips
You’ll be telling your kids about how your proposal went. Make it memorable.
I once had an engaged friend tell me to put as much time, effort and love into my proposal as possible. He said that seeing your fiancé tell the story to their family and friends makes it a moment in time you need too dedicate yourself to. This story needs to memorable. It needs to be something that your fiancé is proud to tell. One that makes them smile. A story that they won’t get sick of sharing.
Did I take his advice and do it? I’d like to think so.
Could I have done more? Yes. Harsh but probably the truth.
On November 15th 2024, I experienced one of the best days of my life. You guessed it - I proposed to my partner. Here’s a quick overview of how it went before I give you 5 tips that are crucial to make it happen.
It’s a simple story. My partner and I hadn’t been on a date day in awhile so I thought that’s what I’d label it as in the calendar. It gave me an incredible excuse to tell her about all the “extra” things that I booked. We started the day at the Alba Thermal Springs and Spa on the Mornington Peninsula. It’s luxurious, quiet and we felt way out of our depth. I’d like to think that we do semi-luxurious things every now and again. I’d spent a tremendous amount on money at Grossi Florentino for her 22nd birthday. I thought I was doing alright at the “treating my girlfriend with a luxury experience” thing. This was a different sort of place. Hot Springs where we could bathe in hot water in the hot sun. Hot, right? I forgot to consider that it was middle of November which proved to bit a little warmer than expected. After that, we moved onto our classic Mornington brunch spot - Commonfolk Coffee. The menu changed and it was a little lack lustre. It didn’t stop us from having delicious lunch with our second coffee of the day. Commonfolk Coffee are really good at coffee making. I couldn’t tell you what we talked about. I was a man overcome with nervousness. I spent the entirety of my lunch praying that my fiancé wouldn’t touch my sweaty hands. My day had a timeline. A strict timeline. We were quick to move from lunch, travelling south to Phillip Island. A 1.5hr drive was ahead of us. The plan was to blast music as loud as possible so that my fiance had no choice but to dance and singalong, completely distracting her from the fact that my body was tingling and hands were sweating. I remember holding the wheel of the car with three fingers so I could put the palms of hand over the aircon so that if we held hands, I’d be in the clear. Josie still didn’t catch on. We arrived at Phillip Island, walked up a large hill in Birkenstock Bostons (terrible choice of attire). I found the spot, dropped the knee and Josie said yes. I never had any doubt she’d say no. Engagement and marriage was something we had spoken about our entire relationship. I was more concerned that she would know what was happening. There were certainly suspicious signs but Josie never caught on. After experiencing all this and being a part of many engagements of close friends, I feel like I have some advice for the people who are considering or are going to propose very soon.
Plan in advance.
There’s a reason why I’ve put this at number one. It should be the first thing on your mind when planning out your engagement. Do you plan to get the engagement ring in advance? Do you put time into how it will look? Your proposal should be the same. It’s by far one of the best experiences you’ll ever have which is why it deserves to be planned in advance. I suggest starting around the 6 month mark. It makes the entire process smoother, less stressful and allows for yourself or others to recognise any blemishes in your plan.
Mistakes are memorable.
The best parts about an engagement story are the mistakes. The moments where your fiancé picks up on something unusual that you said. For me, Josie thought it was funny that I told us to wear Birkenstock Bostons and then walk up a huge hill. Mid-climb Josie asked me why we’re walking up this hill. I was flustered, rushing to find a response. What did I say? “What are these type of flowers?'“ Stupid. Incredibly suspicious. By far one of the best parts of the story. Don’t sweat making a mistake. They either bring the day to life or make your surprise come crumbling down. At the end of the day, the mistakes are funniest parts.
Don’t travel far.
Never ever drive 1.5hrs to to your engagement spot. If anything, do the all the long stints of driving at the beginning of the day way before you actually plan to drop the knee. The power of nerves are not to be underestimated. If you took the time to read my engagement story above you might recognise the things that nerves did to my body. Tingles, sweats and head cloudiness took over on the engagement day. If you’re willing to handle all of that for 1.5hrs in a car whilst trying to hide the ring and the surprise, then be my guest. My advice? Don’t travel far.
Capture the moment.
Now this one is a case by case scenario. I know many people who wouldn’t think twice about hiring someone to take photos of the special moment. For those of you who want the moment to be personal, just the two of you, take the time to setup a camera. It can be hidden or in plain obvious sight. By that point your fiancé may already know what’s happening. Either way, this moment must be captured. Josie and I always look back on our engagement video and feels all the feels we experienced in the moment. The video hasn’t gone anywhere. It hasn’t been shown to anyone. It was simply a camera on a tripod capturing a monumental time in our lives. Capture the moment.
Put your all into it.
Put your all into your engagement. If that’s not much, then put your all into it. If it means travelling from Melbourne to Lake Como, then put your all into it. The story that you get to share to people is extremely valuable. Your partner needs to proud of the story their telling. If that requires time, effort and love? Put your all into it.